it's cold and there are robots

so i stayed in tonight because the pavement is shivering and i think i just heard a pigeon cry, so i made some of this hot chocolate which - and i HATE to sound pushy - but you really need to be drinking it if you're not, because it will make you feel warm and light even though it's filled with fat. so i curled up with the latest issue of Oprah [insert joke here]* and there was a story about deja vu and how it is not really that you are in some kind of twilight zone or lived in a past life, but in fact, you likely have done something similar before. are you surprised? do you believe in past lives? i don't, but even if i did, i wouldn't say so, because then we would see each other at parties or in barnes and noble next sunday pretending to buy fiction even though we are buying self help, and you would go, "oh yeah, see that girl with heels that are too high? she believes she was important in a past life." i'll just say that i want to believe in them so that i can pretend that i was really somebody, you know? wouldn't it be great to find out that you were super important?

i have another thing to say. i was on an appointment at around 3:00 today, and i was talking to a PR woman about how there are all of these cashmere airplane sets that you can buy now, like a kit that comes with a face mask, slippers, and a throw and it's super luxe but we both decided that that is a retarded thing to buy yourself unless you're christina aguilera or you have three first names or one of your names has a symbol in it, so i told her to tell my boss that i'd like it, and she said No.

so then at 4:00, i received a gift and do you know what was inside? a monogrammed kit! exactly what we had discussed, minus the slippers. isn't that ridiculous? if i received this gift three months from now, it would feel like deja vu, but since the events happened one hour apart, it was just really fucking cool and my name isn't even P!NK.

and finally, did you see this thing in the news about the robot that can play the violin? he's five feet tall, white and, according to CNN, "plays a pretty solid pomp & circumstance." so basically every child in my building.



*isn't it obnoxious when people write that?